Tom Brady Pro-Bot

I really don’t want to do an “intereview” for this toy, for many reasons–not the least of which is having to deal once again with the pain of having drafted Tom Brady as my first-round pick in my fantasy football league this year. I can’t imagine interviewing him–or even his robot toy avatar–without breaking down into tears or a bitter rant against the unfairness of life.

I saw these last week at Toys ‘R Us. Predictably, they didn’t have Brady, since he’s the local favorite, but I was able to order him from TRU’s website. You can see the other figures on the packaging photo.

When I saw them, I initially assumed they’d been made by Foamheads, makers of the excellent Fox Sports Robot. But after looking at the package, that doesn’t appear to be the case–these figures were made by a company called Toy Quest.

This is a rare instance (for me) where I think the figure looks better in the packaging than out of it. The box is actually pretty nice, with some good graphics and an overall interesting design. And the figure looks good–in the package.

But once you get him out, you’re going to be disappointed by how cheap the toy is. It feels like a generic Power Rangers rip-off you buy at a pharmacy. Parts of him pop off randomly, and although they snap back on, it still feels cheap.

While the toy does have a lot of articulation, the joints are loose and not that useful. The left shoulder joint on my figure had been attached incorrectly, limiting its motion. While his fingers are articulated, his hand can’t open wide enough to hold the little silver football he comes with, so you can’t pose Tom Brady–Tom Brady!–in the traditional about-to-throw-the-ball stance. Well, I guess you can, thanks to the “magnetic” hand, but it looks weird with the robot holding the ball by its fingertips.

And then there’s the goofy flip-up head. First off, I don’t know who this guy is, but he’s not Tom Brady. Those are not the scruffy-yet-smoldering good looks of Gisele Bundchen’s boytoy. In fact, I’m pretty sure that’s Detective Flack from CSI: NY.

Second, flip-up human heads on robots are usually lame. I know the idea is to help sell the toy via name recognition, but I would rather they not have bothered licensing Tom’s likeness (such as it is), made the figure a generic “Patriots” robot and brought the price down a bit.

Third, whoever this guy is–it’s not Tom Brady–there must be very little of his human body left except for his torso and head, since his arms and legs are way too skinny. Did he hurt himself in some tragic accident and was rebuilt by the NFL R&D department? I mean, I know a lot of QBs have been injured this year, but turning them into cybernetic abominations seems like a rather unwarranted response to the problem.

At a price of $11, I can’t recommend this toy. It’s a $3 toy at best. You can get the much larger, far-superior Fox Sports Robot at TRU for $17.