Toy Aisle Trolls is a feature highlighting acts of vandalism to in-store toy items. If you find a ruined package, a stolen figure, a swapped-out figure, or any other such acts, take a photo (cell phone photos are fine if they’re not blurry) and email them to poe AT poeghostal.com. Also, please note: I’m deliberately being over-the-top with my condemnation of these people–I don’t actually wish bodily harm upon them. Just severe mental anguish.

Today’s T.A.T. comes courtesy of Poester L.

Says L:

I just found this at a Toys R Us: a Movie Masters Two-Face figure with a swiped coin.

In the photo, the flap is folded up a bit – I did that to more clearly show what had been done. I also removed the TRU clearance sticker that had mostly covered the damage (you might notice some orange bits around the hole). As they had reduced the price accordingly, I actually bought the figure.

I can understand why someone would want the scarred coin – it’s a pretty cool pack-in. But the blackguard responsible for this deserves some imaginary punishment. If I may make a suggestion; I think it’s appropriate to flip a coin…

Heads, he (or she- but really… how likely is that?) is horribly disfigured like Mr. Dent, to a degree such that he will forevermore make small children cry at the mere sight of him. The lowlifes with which he is no doubt friends will all shun him. He will find his way to Coney Island, and put himself on display in a sideshow. There he will be cruelly mocked by inconsiderate jerks who will seem to be eerie reflections of his former self. He’ll live under the boardwalk, scavenging scraps of food that fall through the cracks.

Or tails: he develops a nasty rash. It will clear up in a few weeks, but he will have to suffer the indignity of buying an anti-fungal ointment.

Personally, I don’t understand taking just the coin. I couldn’t care less about those “props” they included with this line. Is it even metal? If I came across this in a store, I probably would still buy it just for the Two-Face–I can’t find anything but Harvey Dents at the TRUs near me.